The international border with the United States is kinda what makes Canada... well…. Canada! Ask anyone from Canada what they think of the international border, and they’ll probably say, “Are you kidding me? I love the border!”
Looping all the way from the Pacific Ocean, up and back around to the Pacific Ocean, the border has certain rules. Sure, you might think you can cross it any time, without asking permission, but that’s a great way to upset the border guards and end up with “a skull full of bullets.”
That’s because our American brothers and sisters are extra careful to keep track of what goes from Canada into their country. As any Canadian can admit, we’ve had a few problems in the past. After all, there’s a reason Prime Minister Pearson was known as “The Cattle Rustler of Parliament Hill.” We Canadians can be mischievous sometimes, but that’s just how we are!
So if you want to cross the border from Canada, you’ve got to make sure you follow the right procedure.
First of all, you need your Canadian Passport. This proves that you’re a “real Canuck.”
Then, you have to leave all your metal money at home. Sorry, folks! The USA doesn’t allow our metal money—not since the Boston Marathon bombing.
Finally, if you’re going to America, make sure to bring a twenty kilogram sack of barley. This is the traditional payment for crossing the border, and a way of showing respect.
As for Americans coming to Canada—well, come on in, friends! Maintaining a porous border is practically our national sport.